Of Gods and Pears

Of Gods and Pears

An original thread from the Hivemind Mailing list archives, originally appeared on the list and the old wiki and has been restored to former glory on the new wiki.

It begins with the story of a disabled child, posted by semaJ:

From semaJ

In Brooklyn, New York, Chush is a school that caters to learning

disabled children. Some children remain in Chush for their entire

school career, while others can be main-streamed into conventional

schools.

At a Chush fund-raising dinner, the father of a Chush child delivered

a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After

extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he cried out, "Where

is the perfection in my son Shaya? Everything God does is done with

perfection. But my child cannot understand things as other children

do. My child cannot remember facts and figures as other children do.

Where is God's perfection?"

The audience was shocked by the question, pained by the father's

anguish and stilled by the piercing query. "I believe," the father

answered, "that when God brings a child like this into the world, the

perfection that he seeks is in the way people react to this child."

He then told the following story about his son Shaya: One afternoon

Shaya and his father walked past a park where some boys Shaya knew

were playing baseball. Shaya asked, "Do you think they will let me

play?" Shaya's father knew that his son was not at all athletic and

that most boys would not want him on their team. But Shaya's father

understood that if his son was chosen to play it would give him a

comfortable sense of belonging. Shaya's father approached one of the

boys in the field and asked if Shaya could play.

The boy looked around for guidance from his team-mates. Getting none,

he took matters into his own hands and said "We are losing by six runs

and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team

and we'll try to put him up to bat in the ninth inning."

Shaya's father was ecstatic as Shaya smiled broadly. Shaya was told

to put on a glove and go out to play short center field. In the bottom

of the eighth inning, Shaya's team scored a few runs but was still

behind by three. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shaya's team

scored again and now with two outs and the bases loaded with the

potential winning run on base, Shaya was scheduled to be up. Would

the team actually let Shaya bat at this juncture and give away

their chance to win the game?

Surprisingly, Shaya was given the bat. Everyone knew that it was all

but impossible because Shaya didn't even know how to hold the bat

properly, let alone hit with it. However as Shaya stepped up to the

plate, the pitcher moved a few steps to lob the ball in softly so

Shaya should at least be able to make contact. The first pitch came in

and Shaya swung clumsily and missed. One of Shaya's team-mates came

up to Shaya and together the held the bat and faced the pitcher

waiting for the next pitch. The pitcher again took a few steps

forward to toss the ball softly toward Shaya. As the pitch came in,

Shaya and his team-mate swung at the bat and together they hit a slow

ground ball to the pitcher. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder

and could easily have thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shaya

would have been out and that would have ended the game. Instead, the

pitcher took the ball and threw it on a high arc to right field, far

beyond reach of the first baseman. Everyone started yelling, "Shaya,

run to first. Run to first." Never in his life had Shaya run to

first. He scampered down the baseline wide-eyed and startled. By the

time he reached first base, the right fielder had the ball. He could

have thrown the ball to the second baseman who would tag out Shaya,

who was still running. But the right fielder understood what the

pitcher's intentions were, so he threw the ball high and far over the

third baseman's head. Everyone yelled, "Run to second, run to

second." Shaya ran towards second base as the runners ahead of him

deliriously circled the bases towards home. As Shaya reached second

base, the opposing short stop ran to him, turned him in the direction

of third base and shouted, "Run to third." As Shaya rounded third,

the boys from both teams ran behind him screaming, "Shaya run home."

Shaya ran home, stepped on home plate and all 18 boys lifted him

on their shoulders and made him the hero, as he had just hit a "grand

slam" and won the game for his team.

"That day," said the father softly with tears now rolling down his

face, "those 18 boys reached their level of God's perfection."

semaJ continues

Funny how this is so true and shame on us! Funny how simple it is for

people to trash God and then wonder why the world is going to hell.

Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the

Bible says. Funny how you can send a thousand 'jokes' through e-mail

and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages

regarding God, and something good, people think twice about

sharing.

Funny how the lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene pass freely through

cyberspace, but the public discussion of God is suppressed in the

school and workplace. Funny isn't it? Funny how when you go to

forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address

list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will

think of you for sending it to them. Funny how I can be more worried

about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me.

Funny isn't it?!

Antoine was the first to comment

Beautiful story, but why on earth would anyone want to drag God into

it? Near as I could see the only people present were people.

FrankE had an answer

Because those who believe in God see God in all good things around

them. Those who do not see only the actions of people. Funny, though,

that those who believe in God seem to blame people for the bad things

in the world, and thank God for the good things. And those who don't

believe in God, thank people or themselves for the good things, and

blame God for the bad things :)

We're a pretty screwed up buncha humanoids, we are. :)

Ivo, plus disclaimer

And the smart people will claim credit for the good things

and blame other people for the bad things.

(No offence, implied or otherwise, intended to those who do

believe in a god in whatever form/shape. Far be it from me

to claim knowledge on a subject I cannot prove either way.)

semaJ again

Just thought it was cute.

Bretton agrees

It was ... one thing that got me is it still contained the

"forward to all your friends" thing ... i.e. an example of

one of these strange email based memes that exist these days.

While some are blatant about forwarding stuff to everyone,

this one asks you to question who you choose to send it to.

Chances are good that in this fashion it will only go to

certain people and thus stay 'alive' for considerably longer.

(And at risk of offending certain people, I've found that

some vigorous christians who have email access often forward

just about every email they get and don't consider any of it

spam because they're 'doing god's work' or something to that

effect ... strange how I haven't had an early morning

solicitation via email by any jehovah's witnesses yet ...

they seem to prefer knocking on my door :-/ )

cameronjames remembered

That reminds me...

What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's witness with a hells

angel??.....Someone who knocks on your door every Sunday

morning ant tells you to F*ck off!!!!....LOL;)

Jon

Not that I intend to spark a religious flame-war here, but it

seems that most religions blame people for everything bad, and

then praise a deity for everything good. What is inherently

wrong about believing that people can do good with being forced

into it by a god? Why shouldn't people occasionally do something

nice by themselves, without worrying about the number of karmic

brownie points is will earn them?

Most religions seem to go out of their way to deglorify human nature.

Given how lousy said nature usually is, seems to me we should go

out of our way to give credit where it's due, and not deflate it by

saying, "oh, he did something nice. Well, thank god for that."

when we should be saying "oh, he did something nice. People can be

really cool after all."

Just my heretic 2c, of course. I just get sick of people blaming

god for everything, and not taking responsibility for themselves.

<a knocking without>

Jon: who's there?

<a voice>: the Spanish Inquisition!

Jon: but I didn't expect...

Guy, philosophising

I'm not a religious person.....nor do I enjoy religious debates,

but I feel that each and every person contains their gods, and their

beliefs within themselves....

semaJ

"A christian who takes offence will reap what he has sown."

(From semaJ's "Don't listen to me I'm just talking crap."

to be published in the next millenium.)

And then Alicia mention the avocado

Proof of G-d can be found in the Avocado.

I really believe this.

0;>

semaJ

Or to be more specific, proof of the avocado can be found in guacamole

Robin

Hmm.. My mind ranged from "tastey and nutritious once you peel and

pip the fruit" to "goes a nasty smelling greeny black goo if you

hang on to it too long."  :-)

michele asked

But is an Avocado a nut, a fruit, a seed or a veggie?

Alicia took a deep breath and said

An Avo is a fruit containing a seed. It is most often treated as a

vegetable and can be eaten with just about any food, be it vegetable

or dairy, meat or fish, salty or sweet, spicy or burny, raw,

liquidated or cooked. In a lassi (eastern yoghurt drink) it is

sweetened with honey and, contrary to the way it sounds, tastes amazing.

In Delores, Mexico, an avocado ice-cream is available that can wow any

tastebud. Not to mention that brilliant dip, of which avo is the main

ingredient.

Avos are filling, one ripe avo being a meal in itself. They can be

sprinkled with salt, pepper, soy sauce, chilli, curry, vinegar, lemon,

tuna, seafood, mince, salad dressing or etc. There are many varieties,

most of which are found in Venda and, all taste wonderful. Plus, if your

mouth is burning from a curried or chillied dish, a mouthful of avo will

ease the burn.

An avo is nutrious too. Amongst other things, it contains certain fats

that are extremely healthy for human beings. These fats were once thought

to be unhealthy because they are fats but such is not the case.

The trees are sturdy, shady, take only seven to ten years to bear fruit,

and give that fruit for generations.

Only parrots, and perhaps other kinds of birds too, cannot appreciate

avocados. Any part of the tree or fruit ingested is fatal to these

creatures. This could be why avos are found in the wild unpecked.

Good for us, anyway.

Avos are kosher, hallal, fruitarian etc. They fit into almost anyone's

chosen diet. They can also be cooked, although most people prefer them raw.

michele again

And if proof of god is in an avo, then is man created in the avo's image?

Alicia

What with beer bellies and pregnancies, I'll let you decide.

michele

I think I believe it too.... But for the sceptic in me, please explain the theorem...

Alicia

It's really very simple. I love avos. Only the most loving, most

benevolent higher power could have created so perfect a fruit for me.

I'm told that G-d loves me, but actions speak louder than words; and

with an avocado, how could S/He say it better?

Gary, being pragmatic

How come the shops almost always sell them not ripe ??

Alicia

Only G-d knows the truth behind that one! I can guess, though:

Avos are only beautifully ripe for a while before they start going rotten.

Probably the shops don't want to take the chance on shelflife.

There are some places that sell 'ready-to-eat' avos, however.

I think Woolworths is one.

John's shopping tip

Mostly, the best avos come from the dudes selling them at robots for

R10 a bag. They take about a week to ripen, but at least they actually

do ripen before they rot, unlike avos from Spar. Then you have avo glut.

Heehee.

Guy, still philosophising

hmmmm

The ripness of the avocado in the analogy of of being god is quite simple.

We leave god on the window sill, until you feel he is ready to eat

(maybe the eatin is a bad metaphor....but hell it amuses the &^% out of me),

nobody can be as dismissive of god as you can..hence the grocer is not

aloud to dismiss the avo.

Yeeeeeeeeees. <carefully takes a few steps back>

Fruit ripening advice from Alicia

The good news is that you are not left at the mercy of the process of

slowly ripening avocados. You can speed it up by placing unripe avos

in the same bowl as a bunch of bananas. Bananas give off something

(I forget technical word) that makes any fruit or veg ripen faster.

Janet

Ethylene

John confirmed

Ethylene. That's why planting nasturtiums amongst your tomatoes helps

them ripen faster. Nasturtium leaves give off Ethylene.

It's also why tomatoes in shops are usually only ripe on the outside.

The tomatoes are picked and then stored in Nitrogen to prevent them

from rotting. Then the nitrogen is replaced with ethylene just before

they're shipped out, which makes them look nice & red from the outside.

But the inside never got to ripen. AFAIK, the whole process is fairly

standard for industrial strength fruit farming.

Alicia, getting excited

Ooooh, John! Do you know much about permaculture? What grows best with

what beside it and how to do it? I'm really keen to know; we grow veggies

and herbs (at least, my brother does, but I'm always very encouraging).

John's gardening tip

http://www.ghorganics.com/page2.html is one page I found on

companion planting.

Alicia, getting more excited

Plus, you may know of a natural way to get the avo tree to grow faster

aside from talking to it. I also talk to the lemon tree. No point growing

avos unless you grow lemons too...

[happily dreaming]

Bretton and the tree

We have a huge Avo tree here. It fruited with a good few hundred avo's.

We managed to eat about three. Seems the neighbours know about the tree

too ... two weeks and all gone !!

They didn't taste right though. Now was this because these avo's are

natural and the ones and Pick n Pay are loaded with insecticides etc ...

or is it just a species difference?

Gary

Sure your tree wasn't planted from GM sources?? <G>

werner has an answer

it's because they are naturally ripened.

My grandad had an apple tree that bore tiny, hale damaged apples, they

tasted like appletiser. ahhh... memories

Fruit ripening advice from Rocco

Try Microwaving the Avo on high power for a few seconds (depends on

the microwave... so try your own) it works for me to "kick-start" the

ripening... They should be ready to eat the next day :)

semaJ

I don't know. I tried it on my poodle and that didn't work.

leon

you have a poodle?

no way.

Jon

Not any more he doesn't...

Alicia

I've lately been envisioning a paradise of a garden in which most things

are edible and the rest smell good. All indiginous, of course.

John

In that case you can't grow tomatoes, carrots, potatoes, fennel, green

papers, brinjal, basil, oregano, thyme, rosemary (to mention a few)

- all from elsewhere.

Alicia

I am a very flexible human being, happy to make general statements which

can then be qualified by valid exceptions. *I* decide what a valid exception

is, of course, and all of the above delicious flora (including the ones that

you did not mention) qualify. Ahem. 0;>

[who never gives up and who never gives in, just changes her mind.]

John

Heh. I see you've been taking lessons from the caterpillar in Alicia in

Wonderland. Or was it the caterpillar? Sheesh, I can never remember.

FrankE

So we should, then, redefine the word 'indigenous' to include common and

garden varieties of items that are actually alien to South Africa ...?

Strange idea.

Alicia

Certainly not. In anybody else's garden, that flora would not be indigenous.

In my imaginary paradise, however, I get to label anything indigenous as I

choose, no matter how foriegn it is.

I get to play G-d, in fact. LOL!

[grinning]

Gary

I think Alicia was hoping you'd requalify her statement as "ingenious" :)

Guy

What concerns me is what the hell this means for bunches of bananas but

more importantly seasonal fruits....and melons

Alicia, getting even more excited

I like bananas too. Full of energy, bananas. They rank third on my fruit

list. Mangos are second. Somebody stop me!

Yes, let's stop there. :-)

---

Compiled by Ant Brooks (2000-06-13)

Recovered and added to wiki by Bretton (2005-11-04)